Friday, November 26, 2010

Gifts and Games: Findings from Positive Psychology

Try these 10 actions to get happier now:

 Give It Away, Give It Away Now! - G
 Take Initiative at Work - I
 Make Friends, Treasure Family - F
 Say Thank You Like You Mean It - T
Smile Even When You Don’t Feel Like It - S
 GIFTS


Have Meaningful Goals - G
Avoid Comparisons - A
 Put Money Low on the List - M
 Get Out and Exercise - E
Savor Everyday Moments - S
GAMES

 GIFTS and GAMES?
 Please forgive my anagrams.

More information in this article at  Alternet

Acknowledgements:
Jen Angel, Yes Magazine
Sonia Lyubomirsky, author, psychologist
E. Diener and R. Biswas-Diener and Stephen Post

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Hope Your Thanksgiving Is Happy

         Freedom from Want, by Norman Rockwell, 1943

As we head into the conventional Thursday Thanksgiving Day holiday celebration here in America, we need to show gratitude for the blessings we have been given all year, including readers of this blog, and to celebrate the year's harvest of food. 

Whenever and wherever we celebrate, harvests binds cultures together. We can all relate to their significance. Harvest festival is earlier and religious in nature in England, usually during the month of September. Canada celebrates Thanksgiving Weekend as a long weekend, including a Monday holiday the first weekend in October, much the same as here.

At our house, we have goose, dry-brined for a day in a mixture of salt and spices. With that, we have braised vegetables, homebaked breads, Cold Soil wine from Terhune Orchards. This we finish with homemade cherry and apple pies and cheeses. It's a small celebration for us, just rather formal and filled with meaning and emotion. As we set the tablecloth on the table, arrange china and silverware and light the candles, we wish everyone good, fine conversation.

Thanksgiving Day is a holiday to celebrate with humility and gratitude, and who wouldn't want more of that?

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Be Careful Whom You Bring Home


Broadmoor Hospital

A recent interview aired on BBC radio Nov. 20, 2010  concerned Broadmoor, a high security psychiatric hospital in England for men. This notorious British hospital has housed numerous dangerous inmates and captured the imagination of the British public since Victorian times.

Dr. Gwen Adshead
The Independent

The interviewer questioned Dr. Gwen Adshead, the unexpectedly mellifluous New-Zealand-raised Psychiatrist and Forensic Psychotherapist (and here is a wonderful example of what is generally meant by the word, I think).

We heard that patients are not admitted voluntarily to Broadmoor. They are admitted when they are considered a risk to society and other people and then are frequently subjected to revisions and reviews.

These risk of violence of these patients is raised by:
1) a paranoid state of mind caused by drinking or drugs
2) anti-social attitudes, they don't like others and see others as a predator on prey
3) the homicidal

She asserted the surprising point: you are most likely to be murdered by a person you sleep with, so be careful whom you bring home.

Broadmoor patients are "survivors of a disaster of which they are the disaster."

Dr. Adshead emphasized there is no direct link between crime and mental illness. At the same time, a causal relationship needs to be looked at in brain scans, how they think, their behavior, how their childhood histories have affected them, their world views and how they regulate negative feelings.

The most common illnesses at Broadmoor are:

1) paranoid schizophrenia
2) major affective (mood) disorders
3) psychotic disorders (loss of contact with reality),
4) borderline (mood) disorders
5) anti-social, callous, cruel attitude to others.

Broadmoor has a further function; it protects the public from homicidal individuals. It's a rehabilitative, restorative, and therapeutic community, according to Dr. Adshead. We are "homo narrans." Humans love to tell stories, and make meaning out of our stories.

 In Broadmoor:
  • 1/3 of patients came from prisons
  • 1/3 were impossible to manage in general psychiatric settings.
  • 1/3 had an incomprehensible natural "element to offend".

The patients and doctors look at diagnosis and treatment options and the fear that brought them there. Treatment options are available; patients come angry, frightened, resistant to treatment. At Broadmoor, they join "a community of the excluded." Everyone needs to be attached to where they feel more secure and can grow, she said,  and most become interested in treatments. Unfortunately, some patients enter Broadmoor nasty, cruel and predatory. Nurses have to work hard and learn not to retaliate.

When asked why she works there, she said that she is interested in why people want to hurt other people, and wanted to work with the best people on the most complicated cases. Dr. Adshead says they way a society treats the least loved members is a measure of the health of a society. She says Broadmoor is giving compassionate, highly skilled treatment, and she said "it's good to be part of it."

Wikipedia says patients stay from six months to thirty years at Broadmoor. Built in 1863, Broadmoor is located in Crowthorne, Berkshire, United Kingdom. Women  patients are housed at Southall. Other famous British psychiatric hospitals are Ashworth in Merseyside, Rampton, in Nottinghamshire and Carstairs in Scotland.

Click here for the interesting podcast interview at BBC.com.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Rules To Live By In America


Thomas Jefferson,  Third President, 1801-1809


Jefferson's Rules:
  1. Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today.
  2. Never trouble another for what you can do yourself.
  3. Never spend money before you have earned it.
  4. Never buy what you don't want because it is cheap; it will be dear to you.
  5. Take care of your cents: Dollars will take care of themselves.
  6. Pride costs us more than hunger, thirst and cold.
  7. We seldom repent of having eaten too little.
  8. Nothing is troublesome that we do willingly.
  9. How much pain the evils have cost us that have never happened.
  10. Take things always by the smooth handle.*
  11. Think as you please, and so let others, and you will have no disputes.
  12. When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, count a hundred.
Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826)
From "Canons of Conduct" Written for his namesake Thomas Jefferson Smith, Feb. 21, 1825.

* meaning, "the exchange of ideas must always be civil" or interpreted by the reader. (monticello.org)

Jefferson pared down this list in later life to exclude 5 and 11. Maybe he had money issues and disputes after all.





Saturday, November 6, 2010

Idyllic Frenchtown, New Jersey: Visit Liz Gilbert's "two buttons" And Eat At The "Lovin Oven" Next Door


Lovin Oven, Frenchtown, New Jersey interior, from Josey Miller

While usually I write posts with an international audience in mind, this post will be a review in favor of a wonderful restaurant in Frenchtown, New Jersey. It's a hip, upscale hot spot with flowers and art, and wooden tables and an imaginative menu, partly vegan, with pastries and artisanal breads worthy of greater recognition.

This restaurant has the unusual name, the "Lovin Oven" and I was told to go there by a friend even though it's an hour's drive away. After hearing it shares the building with the Asian artifacts store called "two buttons" owned by the writer of the book "Eat, Pray, Love" now also a movie, Elizabeth Gilbert and her husband, Jose Nunes, I couldn't resist. Trusting this great recommendation and intrigued by the quirky name, I was pleased to finally hear the location of the Gilbert shop, which I had wanted to visit since reading the book.

I definitely recommend the Lovin Oven for sophisticated diners of any age. The scenery of Frenchtown is quaint and accessible, as it is in the other nearby towns of Stockton and Lambertville, some of my favorites in western New Jersey, all situated along the Delaware River. The new address of the  "Lovin Oven" where it has relocated from Milford is in a building with plenty of parking, shared with "two buttons" and a Pilates studio.

Service was friendly, and couldn't have been better. Not for ages have I felt sufficiently inspired to write a restaurant review here, which goes to show how worthy it is of more traffic. It was filled Friday evening, and will likely soon require reservations as they've only recently moved to this new location. After a thorough renovation, the building that used to be an old warehouse now looks unrecognizably different from the view on Google maps.

We enjoyed bruschetta with broccoli, tomatoes and cheese on fresh artisan bread. The tomato soup was very fresh and spicy. For the main course entree, grilled salmon was placed atop Israeli coucous, accompanied by broccoli and carrots. My tortellini had pesto filling and tomato sauce. Dee-licious! We followed these dishes with chocolate chip mint ice cream and Terhune Orchards plum sorbet. What a heavenly taste bouquet.

62 Trenton Avenue, (Route 29) Frenchtown, NJ 08825 - (908) 996-7714 Open Wed-Thu 8am-9pm; Fri-Sat 8am-10pm; Sun 8am-3pm. Wine welcome, byob.

For more information on Frenchtown, you might read a special article in the Washington Post by Josey Miller on July 9, 2010 or see the local magazine, the Frenchtowner.


photo: twobuttons.com